The Georgetown Voice ? Phone sex can get you off, but it can't get ...

As Valentine?s Day passes and we begin to round off another year, those of us in long-distance relationships find our hearts? desires once again called into question.

The typical long-distance college relationship is stereotyped by a faithful freshman staying true to his or her high school sweetheart of many years. While this is accurate in many cases, it certainly should not be used to belittle the situation. Distance dating is painful, confusing, and difficult. We come to college in the middle of a strong and healthy relationship, willing to give it a chance, not wanting to give up on something that works perfectly well. We live with our hearts in two places, unsure of what the right direction is. If families that go through military deployments and hard career commutes can cope, why can?t we?

It?s common knowledge some long-distance relationships last and some do not. It is admittedly easy to stand against them. It can be argued that college is our one time to be free, without commitments. This is when it is OK to be a little selfish, to dabble in different ideologies and experiences. No one wants to be stuck with their heart and mind somewhere else while something extraordinary is around them. No one wants to be in a semi-relationship, unable to even see each other, doomed to be lacking a very important factor during the best time of their life.

But still there are factors that cannot be ignored. Love is what it is. If you are in it, you can?t control it. That special someone is important to you, you love them, and there is nothing inherent within your relationship that means it does not work and you should not be together. You work wonderfully as a couple. If you give up on this, are you giving up on something that some people never get to experience? What if they?re ?the one?? There is nothing wrong with wanting to hear his/her voice during that weekly call. There is nothing wrong with being in love during college. We wonder if it?s worse to have one foot on campus and one where our significant other is, straddling the miles in-between, or to be miserably mourning your loss by yourself in a completely foreign environment. Perhaps a decision is postponed because of the fear of making the wrong choice.

I honestly cannot say which answer is correct. I have tried to present the good and bad of long-distance relationships, but I don?t think there is a right answer. It is up to the couple, and I don?t see how someone can feasibly force their emotions in one direction, essentially obliging themselves to stop loving someone. In my experience, a sincere phone call was enough for me until we could see each other over breaks. It was worth it for me, but not for my significant other. I put everything I could in it, but it simply wasn?t what he wanted. We dated up until the beginning of my sophomore year at Georgetown and still, I think it could have worked.

As hopeless as it sounds, it really just seems to be that there are no right answers. I cannot truly comprehend someone else?s emotions in the matter. My suggestion to those of us Hoyas still tangled in this dilemma is to do what makes you happy. If it works, just let it be. Some of us aren?t cut out for it and some are, as testified by those of us who make it.

We hear almost everywhere that love is enough, that their physical presence should not be the most important. I am one of those believers, but not everyone is. I maintain that if you are in this conflicting situation, it is simply your misfortune to be in it. Maybe it seems tough-hearted, but I believe it?s just something to be beared. It is what it is; get over it.

The choice doesn?t have to exist. I had two conflicting blessings occurring at once, but that doesn?t mean one had to be chosen over the other. That?s just life?it?s never ideal or fair. Why do we expect it to be in this period of our lives, in college? I came into college in the middle of a love story, and maybe that?s just my misfortune that it took place when it did. I simply could not force myself to stop liking someone or end something that was worth it, incredible.

Take time to enjoy college, but that does not necessitate that you end everything. If that person fits well with you, you should not feel compelled to strike them off just because of a little distance. Love is more powerful. And if college freedom is chosen over your relationship, know that that does not mean it is over forever. To revisit my first question, I think we college students can do it, too. There is no comprehensive reason why we cannot; I believe that powerfully in love. But, I will say that not everyone experiences college or long-distance love the same way.

Source: http://georgetownvoice.com/2013/02/20/phone-sex-can-get-you-off-but-it-can%E2%80%99t-get-you-in/

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